Custom Search

Monday, June 23, 2008

How to get over a disappointment

Disclaimer: This is for girls only. However, if a guy relates to it, Bravo! You have a heart! Read on...

This disappointment can be a day, a person or a relationship. For a person like me, rather for most of us, disappointment and being let down are the worse things to happen. I mean I can handle a fight, a bruise, a bad hair day, a broke month, a bitchy client but I just crumple and break down if I am disappointed in someone. Maybe because I trust only a very very very few people... Very Few... Only 2 or 3 people in my entire blessed life. Yes, it is ‘this’ serious. Anyway, I know (through my bookish knowledge) that life is not too serious and you eventually wake up and realize that you have healed and that you are ready for new things. Ha! I’m turning into a psycho. Watch out you so called ‘best friends’, hurt me more and I might just get insane enough to stab you in your heart one of these days. Ah, the smell of traitor-blood...

Okay, so this is not about my misery, but it is about how to cope up with such situation when it gets hard to breathe. Girls, everything I say here is tested personally and works wonders. So if there is anyone around here who has had heartbreaks, heartaches, betrayals or disappointments, this is for you! And and and if someone is here who doesn’t have these problems, well, I’m jealous, please walk off my blog. I hate you already. Hmph. So my dear readers, if there is any such thing bothering you, here is my piece of advice:

(Since this another addition to mi 'How to..." series, it should go into that tag, remind me, will you?)

  1. No Details phlueeze: Don’t go over the details every moment. It only makes the situation tough and suffocating. Leave it to where it is.
  2. Drink: It is okay if you don’t drink. You can maybe try it once, a broken heart deserves to break a rule or two you made for yourself when you were all happy and content. That was history. So indulge and let it flow. I would prefer not to get drunk, but getting a lil’ high won’t hurt at all. You’ll feel good. (Spoilt rotten. Me. heehee.)
  3. Make fun: Make fun of everyone. Comment, be rude in a funny way and poke fun at people. Giggle and laugh. There are enough weird people around to make you laugh. Important note: Dont feel guilty, you are doing this to feel okay and to mend the wound. And obviously, take care of not hurting anyone. :)
  4. Bitching: Bitch about that person in your diary, with your friends, acquaintances or maybe with strangers (Acquaintances and strangers are my favourite). Just tell your story and get done with it. Sometimes you might even get a good advice, who knows. Just open up and bitch. Call him names, cruse him, pick on him and Yell. Might sound stupid, but it works.
  5. Cry: Whoever said don’t cry coz it makes you weak? My experience tells me you should cry bloody well if you feel like it. Cry cry and cry. Be miserable. Cry. Have a low self esteem. Cry. Feel cheated. Cry. Feel lonely. Cry. And one day, sooner than later, you will realize that there is no point in being miserable anyway, anymore. Tears cleanse the heart. Allow yourself that weak moment and cry if you want to. In the end you’ll emerge. Word.
  6. Socialize: If this was a disappointment in lowwwe, chances are that you might have shut off other people from your life while you were happy in the relationship. If this was a disappointment in friends, and you are now afraid to make friends again, well, you only need some good people (bad will also do) to spend your time with and have some fun. Time to socialize now, folks! Catch up with random friends you didn’t have time for before. Go out, have fun and forget all the bad things. (Come to think of it, by socializing, you can get o make fun and bitch about ppl also. Oh, genius!)
  7. Shopping: Indulge, as I said. Shopping is something that will lift your spirits instantly. The sense of loss will quickly be covered up with an elated sense of possession. I don’t have to tell you that this one works, you know it does! Let’s see what you want...A box of chocolates, an expensive fragrance, a paperback book, an expensive dinner at your favorite eating joint...anything that you love, you want or you dont want. :)
  8. Surprise people: yes, you can mend your hurts by making other people happy. Surprises are the best. Surprise a distant friend by sending a funny e –card, surprise your sister by enrolling her into a salsa class she always wanted to attend, surprise your colleague by buying lunch...anything at all. I am going to surprise you by a sudden visit, watch out. Yes, you. Haha!
  9. Trust Yourself: And no one else. Trust only yourself and keep your chin high. Be a snob. Be a proud bitch. Make people cry.Let them beg. But don't let anyone humiliate you. Womanhood is a blessing. Cheers to grace and charm and emotions - which, by the way, men are highly incapable of. Well at least the ones I know are highly inadequate. (This one particularly makes me wonder if something is wrong with me - why do I always have to land up with losers? aaggrh!)

Hmm...I guess this is it. You should feel better. And I saw this on a page I got my inspiration from, and I’m sharing it with you. And remember to smile and laugh and make fun.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

86 comments:

The Lover said...

hmm..weird. I could relate to this. Guess I do or did? have a heart! Nice post.

Ashu said...

kya hua adi ?

Ashu said...

kya hua adi ?

Kenny said...

:) i really can't think of anything else to say of right now...maybe the next time i stop by I'll pitch in a few words. For now u did manage to make me smile ;)

Kenny said...

Ohhhh....and great advice btw...

Spectator said...

eeeeeeewwwwww.... hhhhmmmm. haaaaaannn... aaaahhhheeeeemmm..... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......... *sigh*

(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

I like your opening sentence... "This disappointment can be a day, a person or a relationship."
Some advices are good. but i dont agree with all of them. Drinking is an escape not a way to deal with things, and just because you are having a crappy time you have no right to ruin things for others by making fun of them... no?

:-)

Sach said...

:-)
mast hai yaar...
I have so much to think about from this post...don't mind that smile...it's always thr u c!
Am plannin to start a group..for all we girls goin' through same "abt2go insane phase" .. wanna join??

in btw u r tagged!!!

Gaurav said...

hmmm....wonder whose page acted as inspiration for this must 'save as' and 'frequent refer to' post by Aditi...was it my incomplete blog post....may be,may be not....but what i know is that it helped me....u wont believe but i have actually saved this page,who knows when disappointment knocks your door or rock ur stars...really no idea..!!so better be prepared for d disppointments and heartbreaks...
Thanks for the post!!:))

Kenny said...

Well...i did say i'd be back for a second go!! The smile was for various reasons...firstly cause i could relate to some of the stuff so i could relate to that, so i guess i do have a heart in here someplace, a few of the stuff on the list is what i've been doing the past month (oh yeah...it can work both ways :p ), so That's the second one...n mostly because u make moving on so much more fun!! :) But personally i think alcohol at these times can work in unpredictable ways....lift u up or really take u down, so i prefer the good ol' way of sitting down with a large bowl of chocolate ice cream...the girls were onto something when they started that trend...and i'm here admitting i do it, cause it works for me...Hmmm...maybe ice cream after loads of beer...hmmm.....I'll get back to u ;)

Kenny said...

Wondering if u could not publish the crap comment i wrote earlier....n sorry for the trouble. Have a nice day,..

humbl devil said...

aaaah..the wonders of heartbreak...

so when's the next rant coming???
:)

Harshad Joshi said...

I suggest we write a collaborative blook(blog+book) on our lives, love and hate. I bet this world will be a more beautiful place then ever..Please think seriously..

I am determined to change this world, at least a part of it..as much as I can...

Now about your post - Its the best HOWTO ever..Applies equeally to both men and women alike. I am tempted to copy some of your content on my blog post ;)

My edition will be different, but thanks for providing the initial content.

You rock..!!

--xh-- said...

wow, that is a useful how to. lot of things u said make sense... though i dont prefer getting drunk ot forget, getting a l'll high to enjoy is fine :)
and crying - well, i think only brave ppl can cry... it takes some power to cry out and it is always better to clean wht u hv in ur mid than keeping it and mulling over it...

nice one, yaar.

Pritha said...

Hmm...behind all the humor, I can see a deeply hurt heart Adi... Is everything alright?

Pritha said...

Well now I found myself
Wish I was someone else
My heart are stained with love
Wish I could take it away
I hid behind the shell
In time the pain will melt
My heart are stained with love
Wish I could fake it

I gave my life away
There's nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

You take it in your way

My selfish enemy
Still has the best of me
Empty and feeling numb
Wish I could take it away
I can't control the need
To weak to not concede
Wish I was deaf and dumb
Wish I could fake it

I gave my life away
There's nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

I gave my life away
There's nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

I can't pretend we're the same
I can't pretend we're the same
I can't pretend we're the same

Reemz said...

Ouch! That hurt!

Priyanka Singh said...

The 9th one sounds the best....I am neither a drinker nor a shopoholic....but yes Be a proud bitch totally rocks, as they say offense is the best defense....ahh come to think of it....chill girlie...This too shall pass
*Hugs*

Rahul said...

Beautiful image used here girl. But I can assure all men are not like that. Word.
Cheer up!

Anindita said...

Was kind of smiling through the post. You have given an absolute feel good list! A totally essential thing for all girls out there! :)


Kudos to you! Keep up the good work!

go-phish said...

frankly, i loved it!
*awesome*

ps-also try reading non-intellectual chick-lits, they're fun and easy to skim through when you dont wanna think about larger concepts and world related phenomenons! :)

Scribblers Inc said...

da monologue is da good!!:)

Swayam said...

luved it...just the kinda encouragement i am luking for certain people in my life...and i dont know why women always think its okey to be geting an underhand treatment... takin watevr shit is giving to u jst bcoz u like sumbdy...

Adi Crazy said...

The Lover: You, of all the people, have a heart that is a lot more capable of emotions than most of the people I know. I knew you would relate. :)

Adi Crazy said...

Ashu: Kya bataun yaar? A miserable and helpless phase. But I guess this will go...
:)

Adi Crazy said...

Kenny: :)
Lets have a tequila party some day and discuss all this shit, what say?

Adi Crazy said...

Spectator: hmm....
hmmm.....

hmmmmm.......

Adi Crazy said...

Raaji: Trust me, when I was about to publish this, I thought of your reaction. :)
Off the record, I strictly dont drink.
Okay, I admit this is all that I 'imagine' would work. Otherwise I am so bloody caught in emotions that I cannot do anything else. :)

Adi Crazy said...

Sach: 'abt2go insane phase" haan? Sounds so good and apt and cool. I'll be the treasurer of the group, if you let me, and I'll bring loads of chocolates and sinful eatables to indulge for all our members. Sounds good?

Thanks for the tag honey. Will complete it in the next post.

:)

Adi Crazy said...

Gaurav: aww...I love this picture of yours man! :)
Anyway, this IS partially inspired by that half post of yours. And don't you dare relate to this one, I wish you have a happy and rocking life. :)

Mishra said...

I believe I am kind that you are jealous of- or atleast I like to think so.So, as per your suggestion I will walk off. Lol ! But that will be after my comment ofcourse.

How to is good. I might actually try it- i mean all of it.I have tried a few though like shopping,being rude and socializing.However,I would like to try out the drinking and crying part as soon as I get miserable next.I personally adore you for your opinion on crying.Crying is an act of people who believe in themselves and rather than sharing/bitching it to someone else, like to solve ( or believe in solving )matters on their own.
No need to mention that you should WRITE more often, if at all you find time from schedules.see you around

Adi Crazy said...

Kenny: Didnt publish it. But I published this one. :P

Adi Crazy said...

Humbl Devil: Sooner than you expect. Sigh.

Adi Crazy said...

Harshad: Wow! (claps) goodii!!!! Lets do this man, we'll so much rock!!!
:)

Even the idea makes me feel gooooood.

I'm game.

Adi Crazy said...

-xh-: I also dont mind getting a lil' high - on booze, on ciggi or on a thought. :)
Crying is a brave thing, and i have started to accept my tears now. Thanks man!

Adi Crazy said...

Pritha: (Sad face) yeah...Lets talk over a cup of black coffee?

Adi Crazy said...

Pritha: Lovelyyyy....
Love you so much!

Adi Crazy said...

Reemz: Hurts me too! :(

Adi Crazy said...

Priyanka: That's my fav too! (wink)
I'm hoping it passes soon, it's difficult to wait for it to be over. :(

Thanks for the hugs honey, I really need them.

Adi Crazy said...

Rahul: hmm...I'd like to believe that. Thanks.

Adi Crazy said...

Anindita: :) Thanksyouuuuuuuu!! Hugs!

Adi Crazy said...

Go-Phish: :) (shy smile) Thanks pal. I felt good after writing it too.
And all I'm doing these days is reading non-intellectual chick-lits like little black dress, everybody worth knowing, certain girls and alike. They are AWESOME. Suggest me some more if you can...
:)

Adi Crazy said...

Scribblers: Thankuuu! :P

Adi Crazy said...

Swayam: Yeah...i know exactly what you mean. But I m trying to change. Lets see how successful I get. :)

Thanks a ton!

Anonymous said...

I feel good when I read this post.
Good work.

Adi Crazy said...

Mishra: So here you are, I knew you wrer the only kind who would fit into that 'walk off' condition. :) Thanks for reading it. Yeah, crying is healing at times. It is for ppl who accept themselves and their faults/hurts.

And whenever you drink and get 'talli' do write me a mail on your experiences. (wink)

I'll try and write more often. It really means a lot to me. Thanks a damn lot. I'm a happy girl today. :)

sansmerci said...

I religiously follow these points except the first and last one .. well tht makes a lota diff i guess.. now that i kno what was missin lemme add it to my list .. thanks :)

Sam said...

Am telling you Adi, we are the same!! I do every single thing mentioned in the list and then some more.. And dare anybody catch me at one of those times, there'd be no mercy.. :)
Lurrvvee you sweetie for this one, take care!! :D

go-phish said...

(chimes) Sophie Kinsella!...you HAVE to get your paws on her books! The Shopaholic series, can you keep a secret, undomestic goddess!!!...try allllll!
:)

(hehe)

S said...

any chick lit helps :)

p.s- I loved the comic strip!

Anindita said...

Hugs right back at ya!!! :)

Mishra said...

BTW I quoted you in the latest post that I wrote today.:)

Silvara said...

LOVE the Shopaholic series....probably because I can relate lol...

The cartoon was so sweet...kinda depressing but true as well..

DON said...

Pheww... Did I mentioned that I was expecting this post... confident on the front that u had much more to write .. but left it on advices.

Someone did said:-
"The stupidest mistake in life is thinking the one who hurt you the most, won't hurt you again."

Readers can so easily connect to yr words adii...

Point 5 - Five (we all have this lucky number :) ) reminds me of this:
"If someone you love hurts you cry a river,
build a bridge, and get over it."

Thought clones said...

:-) Not sure why you said, this topic of yours suits gals and not guys. It certainly holds good for guys too. We do shop, cry, drink (not getting drunk.. most of the times) and what not. Nice blog ya.. book marking .. Cheers - Sean.

humbl devil said...

oye...why the sigh???
my expectations were qyt the opposite of what u sed...
:P

Longroads said...

Lovely. I couldn't agree less.

Longroads said...

And the cartoon strip is pretty cool...
:)

Depressing though, yet cool.

Anonymous said...

Good.

gunj said...

boy! i can say for sure all those things help tonnesssss!!
sureshot way of dealing with anything and everythings!! spcly a heartbreak!

J said...

Cute post adi :)

Retail therapy helps and so does hanging out with a bunch of friends over some drinks.

And well, maybe I might be insensitive in saying this but, a heartache ain't the end of the world. There's always tomorrow to look forward to.

Ruchira said...

All options work.
I hope you are out of what troubled you lady.
Smile...

ak said...

jus stoppin here to say hi.. nice blog u have.. u write well.. carry on ur work.. visit my site too. see u there.. bye.. take care..

geet said...

am i so very late here ???

yaar hugsss pehle to... no pity shity just i want to hug ya.

i like your points. last week i did shopping(a lot),mingled with strangers(that boosted my confidence in me) , kept myself busy nd bitched a LOT(a LOT).... and its WORKING.

take care

durai said...

nice pictures...Hey your blog is nice with informative posts and useful. I spend ample time with your blog.

durai said...

tel me your name so that i can add you in my friend list..

durjoy datta said...

All I say to you.....
Hey aditi hasde hasde hasde hasde hasde tu zara

Nahi to bas thoda thoda thoda thoda thoda thoda muskura

Tu Kush Hai to lage ki jahan mein chai hai kushi
Suraj nikle badlon se aur baate zindagi
Sunto zara madhosh hawa tujhse kehne lagi

Ki Aditi woh ko bichadte hain ek na ek din phir mil jate hain
Aditi jane tu ya jaane na phool phir khil jate hain


Kabhi Kabhi aditi Zindagi ,
Mein yuhi koi apna lagta hai
Kabhi Kabhi aditi woh bichad jaye to
Ek sapna lagta hai

HAHAHA!
You can now add that to your list.....
Now that Rehman has dedicated a nice song to everyone with the name ADITI!!

Adi Crazy said...

Anon: Me too :P

Sansmerci: lol. Lemmi know if they work for you Pal. :)

Sam: I told you that long ago Sam! We are so similar, its scary! What are the extra things on your list, tell tell.
*Hugs* Love you!
:)

go-phish: I so much looove you!!! I got the 'Secret Dreamworld of a Shopaholic' and I'm loving it. You rock! *hugs*
:D

S: Yea, they do! Shopaholic is my next. hehe. Thanks a ton, I like this comic strip a lot. You can say that I more or less wrote this complete pst around the image. :)

Anindita: Thanksssssssssssssss! ANd suddenly I am feeling happy. Love you! :)

Mishra: I read and I am so much more happy. Thanks a ton man, you are the best! :) (I mean it)

Silvara: lol...funny, I am reading it right now on the suggestions of go-phish and I am so much loving it. This is me! lol.
Thanks, yes the cartoon is depressing, perfect for my mood. (Ah! Melodrama)
Love you!

DOn: "If someone you love hurts you cry a river,
build a bridge, and get over it." Beautiful. Thanks! :)

Thought Clones: It does make sense to guys, yes. The sane ones. :) Thanks a ton man, catch ya around.

Adi Crazy said...

Humbl Devil: I know. :) ANd now I am back! No more depressing posts!! Cheers! :)

LongRoads: Thanks a lot.

Anon: Thanks.

Gunj: Gee, Thankyouuuuuuuuuu. *hugs*

J: Yeah, it works. (wink)
I'm looking forward to new and better times. :)

Ruchira: Out and healed. :)

AK: Thanks, it means so much. I'll see ya on your blog.

Geet: Nah! You are here at a perfect time, I am happy again now. :) *Hugsssssss*
I swear, bitching and giggling works miracles. lol

Love you!

Durai: Thanks a ton! I'm Aditi. You've got a pretty good blog as well...especially the color. I'l see you arond pal! :)

Durjoy: LOL.I love this song man! Rehman has medicated a complete song to me! Thanks a ton! :)

Kartikey said...

Hi, I didn't read the story, but the photos can make you sad :( ...

Mishra said...

Lady you've been tagged.Check my blog for details

Silvara said...

*truckload of hugs*

and a special grin *GRRRRRRRRRRRIN*

lemonade said...

god..that illustration is so cute yet heart breaking (pun unintended) at the same time...

Sach said...

@adi
Oh sure buddy..U the treasurer n Gaufire the CEO ;)
(OOPS! It was a girl gang..chal koi na we'll adjust!)

Sach said...

Btw..you're tagged!
Come 'nd see if you wish to do it!

Sach said...

Btw,..I have tagged you.
Come 'nd see if you wish to do it!

crazyy lazzy said...

nice write up/suggestion. have dropped in here through mishra's place. actually u r quite knowm for your chirpy and valid comments on mishra's blog. ..mind if a blogroll u.

Sachin Garg said...

hmm..
i thought i d apply the methodology to get over my disappointment over this MBA program.
1. dont go over details: time hi kaha hai and that in itself is a disappointment.
2.Drink: :X
3.Make fun: wow this will help! would ensure that i am thrown outta here in no time!
4.Bitch: even more than this?
5.Cry: well..its not that bad actually.
6.Socilalize: excessive socialization in itself has been a major disappointment. what a catch22 you have put me in Aditi.
7.Shop: Paise kya Mr Mathur denge?
8.Surprise: To begin with, I hope I surprised you with this 77th comment on the post.
9.Trust: well, trust me, theres too much of it there already.
bye.
-your friendly neighborhood stud.

Mishra said...

Girl, I hate it when you get lost.You HAVE to post a little more frequently.

Kenny said...

Knock, knock??

humbl devil said...

you were supposed to post sooner than later!!!
wot happened???

The Big K said...

This blogspot seems to be full of heartbroken people.

Duh!

Mystique Wanderer said...

hmm...dont know abt the heart part...but a split hurts guys as bad as it hurts the girls...

though shopping and all tht jazz doesn't work for us...

time, pals, booze and porn...but of all the things what works is time...it took me six months to recover from my break up...and after having come out a relationship that lasted two years and had a very disappointing end...i think somewhere the wounds always remain...just that life puts on layers of balm over it...so that you eventually stop noticing the scars

Justforyou said...

well it seems that i have a heart and..thanks..you're the best

Rupa said...

read thru the entire post and smiling and not finding the right words for this comment :)
btw, i m just too happy thinking that in next few days i hv got something nice to read,..yeah your other posts :)
keep writing.

Unknown said...

What Awful Advice!!! First you should never bring other people into the mix of an argument.